Monthly Archives: June 2012

“We’ve only been here for five minutes and we’re already talking about gay porn and kidnapping children.”

Quotes from when Doyle and I were taking the written interview for the townhouse:

“No, we can get a fox. If it’s brown, we’ll call it Vulpix, but if it’s more of a white, we’ll call it Ninetales… it’s allowed, they’re domesticated now. But yeah, Chris’ll probably be allergic.”

“Let’s just take the baby and run, we don’t have to live here.”

“Let’s have a cat and name it Mitsy. No, nevermind, let’s not name it Mitsy.”

“We can name the fox ‘Firefox’ and then it will lick the windows and be adorable and then Firefox will be beta-testing Windows.”

“It doesn’t have to be gay porn, it could go either way… ha. But yeah, ‘I’m ordering sausages from Christopher Dyck” would totally work.”

“Let’s start a poll to see how many people thought we were a couple.”

“Let’s start a poll to see how many people thought you were gay. Actually, let’s start a poll to see how many people thought you were gay at first and then thought we were a couple.”

“We should have brought a child. We would look more wholesome if we brought a child.

(After Doyle b-sed being a nice, spiritual person in front of some missionaries.) “I’m surprised we didn’t start smelling brimstone.”

“This is a written interview? English majors.

“Can we draw a penguin? We probably shouldn’t draw a penguin.”

“No, we can’t have a fox. No. We can’t. I draw the line….no, not even if we get a dog and tape fox ears to it.”

“We could have just brought Katie. Did her hair, put on a dress.”

“Or we could have brought Chris. Did his hair, put on a dress.”

“…yes. Yes, we could have.”

Everything went pretty well, all things considered. Most of our hushed threats and banter really just came off as the two of us laughing and enjoying each other’s company.

And then Chris couldn’t open the door on the way out.

“He was so stupid that when I hung up, I swore out loud and was angry for about an hour.”

Doyle had to deal with the man that did our credit check today.

Needless to say, he wasn’t impressed.

“It’ll be ugly for a month, and then I’m taking out everything.”

Sometime around the end of May, we actually were able to meet up and go to an open house for a group of townhouses in a co-op complex. The outside of the units had something to be desired, but the inside of the unit we looked at was super cute, clean, and we quickly learned that the community was pretty close-knit and filled with families and kids. Also, it wasn’t expensive. We decided to put in an application.

The boys are ridiculously different in what they notice. Doyle went around with me and looked at everything, cable outlets, bathrooms, the works – we pretty much decided what rooms we wanted, and while Dyck did that with us, afterwards he pretty much just remained downstairs in the living room, staring out the back window.

Note, this is one of those rare for-rent places that’ll actually let its tenants change things. We could paint the walls, hang things, work on the yard, everything, as long as we returned it to normal before we moved out if and when we moved.

Doyle and I go downstairs and Doyle says pretty darn chipperly, “So, Chris, what do you think?”

I am getting rid of everything.”

He wrinkles his lip and points outside at the tiny garden-area outside that is probably a little worse for wear, but not something I really cared too much about. He couldn’t leave the area.

“I’m going to take out those stones, and put this in, and maybe a hedge in the corner, and-”

Doyle and I tried to explain to him that this wasn’t necessarily the exact unit we’d be getting, if our application went through and we got off the wait-list before school. He wouldn’t have it. He looked at us completely seriously.

“It’ll be ugly for a month,” he said, “and then I’m taking out everything.”

After, Doyle ranted at the lady hosting about getting a position on the board at the co-op, and meanwhile, I asked questions about, you know, the unit.

On the way home, Dyck discussed with me what color of flowers would be best for the garden. We pretty much decided on yellow and blue.